The Selfishness of Desire. Sarazanmai 02

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In Sarazamai, our main characters love something because it’s an extension of loving themselves.

Toi wants to be useful to his brother not in order to be useful to his brother, but because it will give him a sense of validation that he is missing. Similarly, I’ve also read enough BL to know that Enta most likely doesn’t like Kazuki as a person, but likes the idea of being in love with Kazuki. And Kazuki is the most egregious offender of them all.

Kazuki wants to make Haruka happy not because of his feelings for his brother, but because in making Haruka happy, Kazuki is transforming himself into the object of Haruka’s adoration. It’s not about making Haruka happy, it’s about making Kazuki happy. Because if this was as simple as being about Kazuki wanting a relationship with his brother, then he could just try and have a relationship with Haruka. Instead, it has to be crouched in Sara-san having a secret relationship with Harukappa. I mean, seriously, there has to be an easier way of talking to your little brother then pretending to be an idol and taking daily pictures dressed up as her all over the city.

Yesterday I had lunch with my mother, where we discussed at length my older brother’s recent complaint that he doesn’t have a real relationship with me and my little sister. What prompted this was recently my younger sister had an argument with him because she doesn’t want him to take his new girlfriend to her commencement ceremony. My brother’s viewpoint was that, obviously, this woman is his girlfriend, and should be included based on that status. My brother even called my mother to complain about my younger sister’s decision, to which she repeatedly tried to explain that my little sister’s commencement isn’t about him: from my younger sister’s perspective, my brother wants to bring a woman that she has never met to a milestone event in my sister’s life. It’s obviously not about supporting my little sister, it’s about coming to a place to show off the latest model and be validated for finding “a catch”.

My older brother, like Kazuki, can’t think about the people around him in any terms other than himself. If my brother wanted, he could come to my younger sister’s commencement to support her — he could spend time getting to know her, her interests, hopes, dreams, and desires. But that would require my brother stepping out of his own box. I hope for Kazuki that he can learn to do it for Haruka.

2 responses to “The Selfishness of Desire. Sarazanmai 02

    • Yeah, it’s an idea that Ikuhara has tackled in Utena and Penguindrum as well, but moreso at the end of each of their runs. I think with him placing it so far in the forefront of the series that he might be exploring it more thoroughly this time.

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